SCREAM!

Friday, November 30, 2007

I love Slipknot and to a certain degree, Children of Bodom. But never did I expect them to sell out THIS WAY!!!

SLIPKNOT

Children Of Bodom

HAHA! Both songs are I think are done by Children of Bodom or appear to be and then some people just go and put them into different videos hahaha!

Funny But Not A Clown screamed @ 12:19 AM

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Friday, November 23, 2007

I remember 3 songs that I heard from Ray Boltz very early into my christian faith. Those are some of the most meaningful songs I ever heard. Somehow, I forgotten about those songs and I forgotten what the songs meant to encourage us over the years. As I grow older into my christian faith, I forgot the basics. I forgot the most important thing. That is to watch the lamb, cast our eyes on Him and leave everything to God. Just now, suddenly, God just reminded me of one of the songs, WATCH THE LAMB and suddenly the other songs just flooded into my mind. I went to youtube to search for the videos and the song. And it was truly a time of God ministering to me again about the basics. I wept because there are many parts of the songs that talked about simple things like YOU DUN HAVE TO CARRY THOSE BURDENS ANYMORE, but yet I find it so hard to do at times. I am going to post the lyrics and the youtube and I hope and I will let these songs minister to you. I hope you will remember your FIRST LOVE.

WATCH THE LAMB - This song is sung from the perspective from the man who was asked by the Roman Soldier to carry the cross for Jesus when they were on the way to crucify Jesus.

Walking on the road to JerusalemThe time had come to sacrifice againMy two small sons,They walked beside me on the roadThe reason that they cameWas to watch the lamb

CHORUS: Daddy, daddy what will we see there?There's so much we don't understandSo I told them of MosesAnd Father AbrahamAnd then I said,Dear children, Watch the lamb
For there will be so manyIn Jerusalem todayWe must be sure the lambDoesn't run awayAnd I told them of MosesAnd Father AbrahamAnd then I said,Dear children, Watch the lamb

When we reached the cityI knew something must be wrongThere were no joyful worshippersNo joyful worship songsI stood there with my childrenIn the midst of angry menAnd then I heard the crowd cry out,Crucify Him

We tried to leave the cityBut we could not get awayForced to play in this drama,A part I did not wish to playWhy upon this dayWere men condemned to die?Why were we standing hereWhere soon they would pass by?

I look and said, Even now they comeThe first one cried for mercy,The people gave him noneThe second one was violent,He was arrogant and loudI still can hear his angry voiceScreaming at the crowd

Then someone said, There's Jesus!And I scarce believed my eyesA man so badly beaten,He barely looked aliveBlood poured from His body,From the thorns upon His browRunning down the crossAnd falling to the ground

I watched Him as He struggledI watched Him as He fellThe cross came down upon His back,The crowd began to yellIn that moment I felt such agonyIn that moment I felt such lossUntil a Roman soldier grabbed my armAnd screamed, You, carry His cross!

At first I tried to resist himThen his hand reached for his swordAnd so I knelt and tookThe cross from the LordI placed it on my shoulderAnd started down the streetThe blood that He'd been sheddingWas running down my cheek

They led us to GolgothaThey drove nailsDeep in His feet and handsAn yet upon the crossI heard Him pray, Father forgive themOh, never have I seen such loveIn any other eyesInto they hands I commit My spirit,He prayed and then He died

I stood for what seemed like yearsI'd lost all sense of timeUntil I felt two tiny handsHolding tight to mineMy children stood there weepingI heard the oldest sayFather, please forgive usThe lamb ran away

Daddy, daddy what have we seen here?There's so muchThat we don't understandSo I took them in my armsAnd we turned and faced the crossAnd then I said,Dear children, watch the Lamb

FEEL THE NAILS- Does Jesus still feel the nails everytime we fall? We are grateful to Jesus for the pain He took on the cross. But is that pain momentary? Everytime we turn against Him, does He still feel the nails bring driven through Him? Does He still hear "CRUCIFY HIM?"

They tell me Jesus died
For my transgressions
And that He paid that price
A long long time ago
When He gave His life for me
On a hill called Calvary
But there's something elseI want to know

CHORUS:
Does He still feel the nails
Every time I fail?
Does He hear the crowd cry,Crucify, again?
Am I causing Him pain?
Then I know I've got to change I just can't bear the thoughtOf hurting Him

It seems that I'm so good
At breaking promises
And I treat His precious grace
So carelessly
But each time He forgives
What if He relivesThe agony He felt on that tree?

Holy, holy, holy is the LordHoly, holy, holy is the Lord

THE ALTAR- That's what this Altar is for. You dun have to carry those burdens anymore. There's a light in the darkness. There's a love thats true. Jesus is waiting. He is waiting here for you.

The service is nearing an end
The choir is singing "Just As I Am"
And now as the old song is played
People at the altar
Are kneeling down to pray
Some are finding mercy
Forgiveness for their sin
Some are fighting battles
And they're struggling to win

The time has come
To give them to the Lord
That's what the altar is for

CHORUS:
That's what this altar is for
You don't have to carryThose burdens anymore
There's a light in the darkness
There's a love that's true
And Jesus is waiting
He is waiting here for you
Go quickly now
Before they close the door
That's what the altar is for

A father is praying with his son
A mother kneels beside them
Thanking God they've come
An old manIs standing there in tears
Giving up a part of him
That he's held back for years
Hearts are being broken
Lives are being changed
And those who call upon Him
Will never be the same

Funny But Not A Clown screamed @ 1:28 AM

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Monday, November 12, 2007

It has been almost 2 months since I blog about anything. TO be honest, things happened very fast and I have been overwhelmed really. I am not affected badly but to be honest, I have been very caught up with many things at work and primarily, my health.

It has also been 2 months since I know I had diabetes. I am managing it well. I have lost 12KGs since 2 months ago, without much exercise. I should start exercising soon. Although I am not starving myself but just changing the things I eat, I am losing so much weight, the doctor advised exercising is still the best way to lose more weight. So swimming pools around SINGAPORE, you better watch out especially since my swim shorts have arrived last friday. MUAHAHAHAHA!

While diabetes is not a problem for me yet, I am controlling my glucose level well and I am especially thankful to God and also proud of myself of the discipline I had so far to control the things I eat. I practically have cut off all sugared drinks and pastries and sweets. I still have my food like a normal person but I am getting better at controlling my portion which will ultimately help me to lose weight which is crucial as this will further reduce my risk of complications from the diabetes.

However, I am having reflux which in layman terms, acid is rushing up from the stomach upwards and irritating my airways. As a result I am coughing alot. It has been 2 months too! haha everything is 2 months, that is why I am saying I am so overwhelmed. My throat feels itchy and "phlegm-ish" very often. The diabetes medicine makes it worse and I vomitted alot. 2 days ago, i just vomitted out my lunch haha. This is really discouraging at times especially when I am singing and jamming, the coughing gets in the way of the vocals and it gets itchy at the slightest strain of the vocal chords sometimes.... I get frustrated and I asked God sometimes is He taking away the gift of singing away from me. I know I asked that question out of frustration and should I even questioned God that way but that is how I really felt. I still trust God will heal me completely without any doubts but to be honest, sometimes I still feel very down and discouraged.

Nowadays, I do not know why, but all these happenings are making me kind of withdrawn. Maybe I am tired. Its only with my good buddies Hanbin and Xiaojun, i feel more relaxed, perhaps because Hanbin knows exactly what it means to go thru an illness that may truely never go away (he had cancer, it can stay in remission but in reality, sometimes it lingers in the back of your mind whether it would come back). And the best way it to look forward and think positively. But Maybe I am just tired from dealing with my own overwhelmed emotions that I had nothing left to deal with others and its causing me to be withdrawn.

God, I still trust in you. In fact, who else can I trust in? I have many thanksgivings during this period but you also know I have as much struggles during this period too. I come to you really broken and frustrated. The only thing that keeps me going and still being able to laugh everyday is the hope I have in you. I know you love me. And I just want to tell you, I love you too.

Thank you Jesus.

Funny But Not A Clown screamed @ 1:39 AM

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